First dates can be fun, and first dates can be torture. But no matter what, they usually make for at least a little bit of excitement: What are you going to wear? What are you going to think of him? And what's going on in his head, anyway? We decided to go straight to the source and ask guys what they're really paying attention to when they're out with you for the first time.
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1. If You're on Time
"The first thing I notice is if she's ready when she said she'd be ready!" —George H.
2. What Happens During the Pauses
"Where her attention goes during quiet moments or conversational lulls. It really keys me into her personality in subtle ways. Lulls during first dates can be uncomfortable in general, but by observing what she does during a lull or a simple quiet moment, I can get clues as to who she is behind the 'first date mask': Is she typically a quiet or more outgoing woman, introvert or extrovert? Does she fidget or exhibit some other cute quirk? Can she spark up the conversation with ease when it does wane? Does she try to hide her discomfort or fill the lull void with constant chatter? Or just go with it and experience the moment?" —Eric B.
3. Whether or Not You Reach for Your Wallet
"Dating has definitely changed a lot in the last couple of years. When I was going on more first dates with people I had already met out at bars or through friends of friends at a party, it was usually just to see if we had a connection since there was already some apparent physical attraction there. Now with online dating, I'm usually looking for an instant spark. And I have to say, as much as I hate to admit it, it's usually more about physical attributes. The first thing I notice is the face. Is she as cute as her profile pictures? Then it's: Does she seem like a warm or cold person? Are we going to enjoy each other's company? I can usually tell if I'm going to want to see the girl within the first five minutes, and usually my mind doesn't change after that—even if we hang out for a while." —Justin D.
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5. How Nice You Are to the Staff
"I always notice how a date treats the wait staff. If she's considerate and kind, that tells me a lot. If she's rude to a waiter or waitress, it's over." —Frank M.
6. Your Smile, Conversation Skills—And Oh Yes, Your Butt
"I always love a woman with a nice smile, and if she is smiling a lot it lets me know that she's comfortable and enjoying herself. Sense of humor is important, too, because nothing is better than a woman who is funny and also appreciates a good joke. Nice butt...you said that you wanted honest answers and this is something I take note of on a first date! And ease of conversation. Nothing is worse than an awkward first date with long pauses of silence. I think the mark of any good first date is the ease of conversation." —Kurt Johnson, fitness and nutrition expert, founder SwollforLife.com
7. How Much You Talk About Yourself
"I mean, I want to get to know her, of course. But if someone seems interested in me and asks me questions about my life, then we're probably connecting a lot better." —Giovani H.
8. Okay, and Your Assets
"The first two things I notice are her eyes and her smile. After that...well, let's just say that there's a little truth in the saying, 'Men are pigs.'" —Jeremy T.
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