You may have noticed lately that condoms have come a long way from those boring rubbers that used to line the shelves. Not only do they have new features (Pleasure bumps? Warming lube? Increased stamina? YES, PLEASE.), but they also cater to your other needs—whether you're vegan, all-organic, or chemical-free.
Still, there are a few things most women probably wouldn't hate to see on a condom box. So we came up with a list of features that would make up the absolute most perfect condom ever. You're welcome.
It's all natural, fair-trade, all-organic everything. Hey, Mother Earth gave us the wonderful joy that IS sex, so really, it's the least we could do to hit her back.
It has a 100 percent pregnancy and STD prevention rate. The current protection is great and all, but for the hypochondriacs among us (*raises hand*), it's not enough. We demand perfection.
It tastes like like pumpkin spice. Because FALL.
It unrolls itself. None of this "oops, I put it on him the wrong way" nonsense. This thing rolls out like it means business.
It's unbreakable. "Oh sorry babe, the condom broke," said most guys at one point or another. Not anymore! This baby's as dependable as your parents calling you on your birthday. (Admittedly awkward reference given the topic at hand, but you know.)
It's virtually undetectable once it's on. And by that we mean it's physically there, yes, but you still can't really feel it inside you. Ever. Oh, and neither can he.
It's free! Fact: All things feel and taste better when they are free. Condoms included.
It makes you orgasm every time. Even during a particularly lackluster session, this thing comes through for you. Hey, a girl can dream, right?
So until this dream condom actually exists, check out these innovative new condoms and some tried-and-true options that are great for your pleasure.
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