You may brush it off if a guy hits on you—even after you've politely tried to turn him down—when you're out with your girlfriends. But here's why you shouldn't: Sexual aggression at bars is a serious problem, according to a new study that will be published in the May 2014 online-only issue of Alcoholism: Clinical & Experimental Research.
Between 2000 and 2002, researchers spent time at large-capacity bars and clubs in Toronto and took observational notes on 258 incidents of sexual aggression—everything from sexist statements and gestures to someone refusing to leave a person alone to someone grabbing a woman's butt or breast or even reaching up her dress.
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Of the 258 incidents, 89.9 percent involved a man targeting a woman, so the researchers only took a closer look at those 232. They analyzed each one, considering how intentional, invasive, and persistent the initiator's actions appeared—as well as how the target responded. They also looked at if/how other people got involved and how intoxicated the initiator and target seemed. (Clearly, one limitation of the study is that these observations were somewhat subjective.)
A few of the most noteworthy findings: Practically all of the incidents involved what the researchers called intentional or probably intentional aggression. Staff rarely intervened to try to help the women. And initiators were more invasive when targets seemed more intoxicated. That means that many of the offending parties were probably targeting drunk women, says Kathryn Graham, Ph.D., first author of the study and a senior scientist at the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health at the University of Toronto.
It's frightening news. And the fact that the women were at a bar shouldn't be an excuse: "If the same thing were done in any other setting, women would call the police or something," says Graham.
The next time you head out, here are some steps you can take to protect yourself:
Pay Attention to What You're Drinking
Of course, the less you drink, the more you'll be aware of what's going on around you. Be particularly wary of mixed drinks, says Tim Larkin, author of Survive the Unthinkable: A Total Guide to Women’s Self-Protection. "The reality is, it's much harder to keep track of your alcohol intake if you're drinking them," he says.
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Get Familiar with Your Surroundings
Larkin says that when you first enter a bar, especially if you've never been to it before, you should look around and figure out where the exits, security, and bartenders are. It's not paranoid, says Larkin—it's just practicing basic awareness. Then you can have a good time, knowing that if you need to get out of the bar quickly or get help for some reason, you'll be aware of exactly which direction to go in.
Follow the 'Girlfriends Rule' for Bathroom Trips
"Girls are really good about going to the bathroom with each other," says Larkin. "That's really smart." Why? Believe it or not, a lot of guys will wait around for women in or just outside of the women's bathroom. "If you're going alone, it's much harder to brush somebody off," says Larkin.
Keep Your Phone Charged
Make sure you phone is fully charged before you leave home that evening, and turn off apps like Facebook and Twitter that use a lot of data and can drain your battery, says Larkin. That way you'll be able to reach friends throughout the night even if you get momentarily separated.
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