Sunday, February 23, 2014

4 Ways to Deal When Your Partner's Job Is Hurting Your Relationship

4 Ways to Deal When Your Partner's Job Is Hurting Your Relationship

The latest episode of <i>Girls</i> leaves Hannah wondering how Adam's new gig will affect her bond with him

Warning: This article contains spoilers about the episode of Girls that aired February 23.

We never thought we'd say these words, but Adam on HBO's Girls has a job. That's right—in the latest episode, he's cast in the Broadway revival of Major Barbara. Hannah is ecstatic—but Patti LuPone, who Hannah happens to be interviewing for an advertorial when she receives the good news about Adam's role, quickly brings her down: "He’s going to need you to support him and forgive him because he’s going to be an asshole," says the actress and singer. "He’s not even going to know you exist—not until the show opens."

It's a sentiment that gets repeated to Hannah over and over again throughout the episode. It gets in her head—to the point where she says to Adam mid-bath, "I don’t want you to get so happy doing the play that you don’t like our life together anymore." Only time will tell how Adam responds to his newfound employment—but acting definitely isn't the only job that can take a toll on the love lives of people who have it. We asked our Facebook followers to share some of the times when their partners' jobs have hurt their relationships—and how they got through the rough patches. Here's what they had to say:

“My husband is an active-duty Marine who’s currently deployed. Even when he’s stateside, he's extremely busy. We make do, though. Luckily I work on base with him, so we meet up for lunches a few times a week. We text throughout the day and plan weekend adventures. When he's deployed, we plan out time for Skype dates where we’ll share a drink while Skyping or watch a movie together. Despite all the time apart we endure, we are one of the closest and strongest couples I know.” —Desiree Nelson

“My husband works in law enforcement, and the schedule can be inconsistent; sometimes he has to work late or on weekends at the last minute. It does bother me, but when I get upset I remind myself of all the good things he does for our family and how hard he works. It helps me appreciate him more.” —Nevada Reeves

“My partner works very hard at his job—which I love and appreciate him for—but sometimes it will prevent him from having the energy to have sex. We deal with it by having sex twice the next day.” —Eva Gilbert

“After being together for about two years and living together for six months, my boyfriend switched shifts. Being on different schedules really took some adjusting for us, and it seemed we were falling out of sync in more ways than one. We had to change our eating habits a little since I'd be ready for dinner at the same time he'd be expecting breakfast. We also had to become more comfortable doing things independently since he might not be ready to wake up just because I'm home for the evening and vice-versa. At the same time, we started to develop relationship rituals so we would have designated times for each other. Things are certainly better now, two years later, but I still miss being able to sleep next to him and being able to text with him during the day.” —Kalene Lukow

 

More From Women's Health:
What to Do If Your Partner Talks Down to You
5 Ways to Make More Time for Your Passion 
Why Men Don't Get Your Subtle Hints

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