Don’t let her sexy texts suck you in. People who send their partners scantily-clad or nude pics tend to be neurotic and disagreeable, a new California State University study reveals.
One trait sexting was not associated with: sensation seeking, or a desire for novelty. That means she may send erotic messages more to entice you than to give herself a sexual charge, says study author Robert Weisskirch, Ph.D.
But don’t read “enticement” as “seduction”—more like entrapment. “Neuroticism means overall nervousness and anxiety,” explains Weisskirch. “And people with low levels of agreeableness are manipulative. Sexting is kind of a desperate attempt to get someone to respond to them.”
He adds that guys generally use provocative messages as a way to attract a new partner (a la Anthony Weiner), while women “look at sexting as a way to keep men interested and responsive.” In particular, nude shots—which are riskier to send than an “I want you” text—are a sign she’s serious about the relationship and may want more commitment.
One critical factor: the stage of your relationship. If you’ve been dating for months and she fires off a bra-and-panties shot, celebrate! But if you’re only at second-date status, you may want to run. “Early sexting indicates a level of risk-taking that may not point to long-term relationship skills, like understanding personal boundaries and good communication,” says Weisskirch. “I don’t know that she’s the ‘crazy’ girl. But she might be someone who is overly concerned with what you post on Facebook, for example.”
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